dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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