he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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