i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize