check it out our google latitudes are spooning
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
a search helicopter?!
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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