sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
