sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
