Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
