the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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