They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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