I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize