burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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