Can Purell be used as lube?
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
