you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
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New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
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Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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