he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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