sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
