i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize