It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
How's work?
Spinning.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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