Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I skipped work to stalk him.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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