It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize
