It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
