p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize