If that was your dad, he is hot
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Is it because I queefed?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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