Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
