That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
