Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
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I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
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the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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