FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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