This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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