Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize