Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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