This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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