That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
