And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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