she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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