Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize