I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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