Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.

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  (215): She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier. http://tfl.nu/gy92
  Replies (25) Good night (683) Bad night (5436)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive

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  (781): Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive http://tfl.nu/cgnf
  Replies (13) Good night (2326) Bad night (3812)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk

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  (267): you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk http://tfl.nu/tgll
  Replies (4) Good night (2994) Bad night (1103)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.

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  (910): Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse. http://tfl.nu/i97p
  Replies (19) Good night (1001) Bad night (2499)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".

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  (719): Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby". http://tfl.nu/v0w5
  Replies (14) Good night (4288) Bad night (1055)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.

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  (916): You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping. http://tfl.nu/nr1z
  Replies (6) Good night (2192) Bad night (600)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.

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  (+44): Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing. http://tfl.nu/5vch
  Replies (3) Good night (1916) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.

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  (910): Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down. (803): Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you. http://tfl.nu/a5n4
  Replies (8) Good night (1818) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.

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  (321): He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF. http://tfl.nu/s52i
  Replies (9) Good night (1454) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.

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  (513): Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me. http://tfl.nu/5lbu
  Replies (5) Good night (1237) Bad night (631)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.

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  (812): the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica. http://tfl.nu/fg5p
  Replies (4) Good night (941) Bad night (458)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.

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  (215): Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C. http://tfl.nu/gqta
  Replies (2) Good night (655) Bad night (376)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.

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  (941): She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night. http://tfl.nu/a6ju
  Replies (13) Good night (674) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool

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  (425): When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool http://tfl.nu/u20j
  Replies (6) Good night (707) Bad night (286)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.

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  (303): Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion. http://tfl.nu/tcgp
  Replies (2) Good night (470) Bad night (274)

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