last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize