More tranny stories later!
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
