yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
