Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
home. puking in laundry basket.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
