it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
