Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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