I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
