dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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