Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
