Christians are straight up FREAKS
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
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Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
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Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.