Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
