Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
