I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
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