woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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